


Long Road to Ruin

by Amerna



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Miscommunication, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 00:57:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8645020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amerna/pseuds/Amerna
Summary: Soulmarks, the first words your soulmate will speak to you, are a fool proof way to find out when you meet the person you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life with. That is, when you don’t have an absolute generic soulmark and could’ve met your person a thousand times over.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Sooooooo, back in January I finished my tabloid story and had a little give away, which Ashley Wells won. She wanted a soulmate story and I started writing. And then I stopped writing for a while because fandom was bumming me out (and tbh, still is). I’m still writing, at a glacial pace though and just for my own amusement, and I’m not sure if I want to return to fandom, but I finished this a few weeks ago and I felt bad about holding it back, so I’m posting it.
> 
> Ashley - sorry, this took me so long! I hope you like it.
> 
> I wrote like 90% of it at the beginning of the year, before Civil War, so obviously it’s not CW compliant. Also: not beta read - I’m sorry.

Darcy Lewis hates soulmarks. Well, maybe not soulmarks per se, but she resents the idea that fate is going to dictate who you are going to be with for the rest of your life. Darcy hasn’t always thought that way but, at some point, Darcy became disillusioned by the whole idea. It doesn’t have to do with the fact that Darcy has a very generic soulmark (“Can I help you?” on her lower back) and could’ve met her soulmate a thousand times over, it has to do with the fact that people are still assholes and that Darcy is a great fan of agency and making your own decision.

She has seen too many people shackled to the wrong person because of the social pressure created by some random writing on your skin that nobody knows where it comes from to begin with. There are too many instances where people remained with their soulmates during domestic abuse, infidelity, and other general asshattery. Then there’s the cottage industry surrounding finding your soulmate.

Sure, there are great examples, too. Darcy’s parents’ marriage had been perfect until their untimely death. Darcy was there when her best friend had met her soulmate and she would never forget the light in her eyes and the expression of utter bliss when she had met the woman she would spend the rest of her life with.

But still a few good instances are not worth being robbed of your own choice. So Darcy is okay with never meeting her soulmate. Whenever somebody asks “Can I help you?” Darcy doesn’t even react anymore.

But maybe hate is too strong a word. Darcy Lewis is highly sceptical of soulmarks.

~*~

For Steve Rogers the whole soulmate thing is another item on the list of “WTF 21st century?!”.

Steve has a lot on his plate after his rude awakening in the middle of New York City, so it takes him a day or two to notice the tattoo on his left side. On his stomach, just below the ribs, somebody has written “Whoops, Captain, sorry” in a very scratchy handwriting. First Steve thinks it to be some very cruel joke, but then he remembers that his skin should be forever unmarred because of the regenerative properties of the serum so normal tattoos wouldn’t stick. So he decides to investigate.

It’s a very understanding SHIELD therapist who explains the concept of soulmarks to Steve. If not for the research provided to him and the mark on his body that for all intents and purposes shouldn’t be there, Steve would think this an elaborate hoax. But apparently it’s true, has been for a few decades now.

Steve processes the information given to him. About the good things and the bad things about soulmates. About the social pressure and the cottage industry. About the blissful reaction when people finally meet their soulmates. About divorce rates at an all time low. But then Steve doesn’t think about it any further. He has other things on his mind. He also met his soulmate already, decades ago. He doesn’t need some random mark on his body to tell him otherwise, that there is another person for him around.

Still, the first time somebody runs into him at SHIELD headquarters in New York and says his words to him, Steve grows tense and stares and then says something completely ridiculous. The person opposite him doesn’t react or at least doesn’t react in a way that SHIELD taught him would be an appropriate reaction when one finds their soulmate. There’s no reaction from her. No star struck look, no light in her eyes, no thunder and lightning and everything frightening. So it’s not her then.

Steve is relieved and continues on. The second time somebody says his words to him, he is more at ease and doesn’t think about the ramifications of finding one’s soulmate that much any longer. Steve grows more relaxed with it as times goes on.

He doesn’t need another soulmate. The concept never appealed to him anyway. He’s perfectly happy with the way things are. The whole concept is kind of ridiculous, he feels.

~*~

After all the stuff that happened in DC Steve moves back to New York and makes it his base of operations for both his mission to find Bucky and his mission to reorganise the Avengers into a global peacekeeping force to make the world a safer place. Tony is offering the place to all the Avengers and the majority of them – all except Natasha – take him up on it.

Tony also extends his R&D facilities (“Candy land, Steve, candy land!”) and offers unlimited funding to Dr Jane Foster, Thor’s girlfriend, who gladly takes him up on it.

Steve enjoys being with his friends. Sam is just one door down, Clint is always up to something ridiculous, Thor is a good friend and an awesome sparring partner. And it’s a good feeling to come home to his makeshift family back at the tower after a particularly gruelling and/or disappointing mission instead of coming home to his own empty apartment, where the only things that await him are curdled milk in the fridge and his own thoughts.

It’s also the first time that Steve can observe soulmates interacting with each other up close and while he has to admit that there’s certainly a lot of love and affection between Pepper and Tony, between Thor and Jane, he still doesn’t get appeal of a tattoo on your body telling you who you are supposed to be with for the rest of your life. Falling in love is easy, upholding a relationship, not screwing it up, is harder.

Steve remains a soulmate sceptic.

~*~

Steve is on his way to the lab to consult Bruce after yet another mission where they found a mysterious chemical on site, when a tiny brunette coming out of Dr Foster’s lab crashes right into him. “Whoops,” she looks up at him, frowning. “Captain, sorry,” she simply says before dashing off.

Steve follows her with his gaze before she disappears around a corner and out of his sight. For a moment he has the strange urge to follow her, run after her, and ask her who she is, to find out everything there is to know about her. But then he just shakes his head as if to get rid of these thoughts and continues to the lab to talk to Bruce.

It takes more than a week before they run into each other again.

~*~

Darcy seriously underestimated the weight of the supplies Jane had her pick up from the basement. She made it from the basement to the elevator with a lot of grunting and panting and shuffling, but now that she’s made it to their floor, the distance between the elevator and Jane’s lab seems insurmountable. And because it’s basically in the middle of the night with only a few scattered scientists still working there’s nobody around to help. Where is Thor with his otherworldly biceps when you need him?

Darcy sighs and bends down to somehow shove the crate in the direction of Jane’s lab. Maybe that will work at least a little bit.

“Can I help you?” a male voice speaks up behind her and Darcy turns around to shoot the newcomer a grateful smile.

She’s blindsided for a moment, because that’s Steve Rogers aka Captain America standing right in front of her in all his patriotic glory. He’s not in uniform, but he’s still impressive. She stares at him for a second, too star struck to say anything. She has the greatest urge to find out everything there is to know about him and just start asking questions and talk to him forever, but then reminds herself that he’s a living, breathing, _real_ person, not a science object (no matter how many essays she wrote about him during both high school and college). She manages to catch her bearings and just answers: “Yes, that would be great. Thanks, Captain.”

“It’s Steve,” he tells her almost immediately, lifts the equipment like it weighs nothing and follows her to Jane’s lab.

“I’m Darcy, I work with Jane,” she explains.

“Oh, the infamous Darcy Lewis, handmaiden and companion to the fair Dr Jane Foster.” Steve grins.

“So you heard about me.”

“Only the good stuff, I’m sure. Thor adores you.” He places the crate in the middle of the lab. Jane looks up distractedly for a second and then goes back to her work.

“Thor has a thing for competent women that can totally hand him his ass,” Darcy says.

“And why shouldn’t he?”

The stand next to each other in companionable silence, until Steve clears his throat. “Well, I should be going…” he says, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck.

“Yeah, you probably have important stuff to do,” Darcy says. “It was good to finally meet you, Captain… Steve. Now the only Avenger I haven’t met yet is Natasha.”

“We met last week,” Steve corrects her almost immediately.

“We did?” Darcy asks. “Sorry, the whole week has been crazy busy. I was operating on maybe three hours of sleep and countless ounces of caffeine.” She frowns, trying to remember. “Oh, right, you were in your uniform? Looking very official, doing serious avenging business.”

“Yup, guilty as charged.”

“How’s that going for you? The whole avenging, saving the world business?”

“There’s always some mess that needs cleaning up, so I guess… yay, job security.”

She grins at him. “That’s the spirit.”

“Wrong superhero,” he retorts, smiling.

Darcy tilts her head to one side and looks up at him. “Of all the answers I did not expect _that_. You into comics?”

“The Spirit was already around in the 1940s. It’s nice that some things are still around.”

“Huh,” Darcy says, surprised. “I did not know that. You have to tell me sometime.”

“I will.”

~*~

Steve and Darcy naturally gravitate towards each other. Their friendship starts tentative at first. They run into each other more often as time goes on and they both make an effort to stop and talk and to get to know each other.

Darcy is patient. At times she’s still mystified that she can have a casual conversation with Captain America, her childhood hero, but that’s not what draws her to him. Darcy wants to show him, Steve Rogers, the man out of time, everything and see his reaction on all there is for him to experience. She’s going to blow his mind with all the stuff he has missed in the last seven decades.

Steve is tentative at first because as well as he has acclimatised to the 21st century, there’s still some things he’s missed and incredibly mystified by. And Darcy is so thoroughly modern, it can be frightening sometimes. But somehow Steve also knows that he can tell Darcy anything and that she will understand. He doesn’t want to overwhelm her though.

Still, their friendship develops slowly and steadily and while it leads to some raised eyebrows and some good-natured teasing from their friends, it doesn’t change anything and at some point a few months later everybody knows how important Steve and Darcy are for each other.

Steve convinces Darcy to further her education and in turn Darcy makes Steve take up art again. When Darcy gets the offer for a promotion and to become Pepper’s PA after graduation, Steve is the first person she calls and asks for advice. Steve is the one steady influence in her life, the one that finally made the tower feel like home. She knows that he’ll never disappoint her, never betray her.

Darcy always waits for Steve when he returns from a mission. Rain or shine, day or night: she’s there on the landing pad with a hug and a smile and a concerned “How have you been?” and it always makes Steve feel better. Seeing Darcy first thing is like coming home and that’s the first time he feels that way in the 21st century.

They explore the city together, got to places they always wanted to go and after they’ve done all that, they just take a car from Tony’s collection or Steve’s bike and drive out of the city, wherever their adventure will lead them on that particular day.

They spend almost all of their free time together.

By some unspoken understanding they never talk about soulmarks.

~*~

Darcy is the first person Steve introduces to Bucky Barnes.

It’s the first time that Darcy is apprehensive – and it has nothing to do with jealousy or that she resents Bucky Barnes for his history with Steve that goes deeper than anything they would ever achieve. She knows that Steve and Bucky are brothers in all but blood. No, whoever or whatever makes Steve happy will make her happy.

At least so far. Because there is this nagging feeling that the recovery of Bucky Barnes unearths: Steve is not for her. There’s another person out there for Steve.

Darcy is happy with Steve. She hopes that she will never meet her soulmate, it would just ruin things. But then, for her to remain happy, it would also mean that Steve will never meet his. And maybe that just too cruel as a twist of fate. Steve deserves to be happy. Steve deserves to find his other half.

So meeting Bucky Barnes leads to the growing realisation that her friendship with Steve might have an expiration date.

~*~

“Why don’t you make a move on Darcy?” Bucky asks one day. “Am I in the way?”

As an answer Steve just pulls up his shirt to reveal his mark.

“And?” Bucky prompts, giving it a cursory glance.

“Did you never get the update about soulmarks?” Steve answers instead.

“I did, but what does it have to do with anything?”

“Darcy is not my soulmate,” Steve states.

“I disagree,” Bucky says simply. “You guys are perfect for each other. You don’t need a mark to tell you that.”

“Then let’s put it this way,” Steve explains patiently, “deciding against your soulmate to be with another person… I think it’s frowned upon. And what if it’s just one-sided anyway? What if she meets her real soulmate? Then I’ll be left with nothing.”

Bucky is silent for a moment. “And there is absolutely no chance that she’s your soulmate? She really didn’t say those words to you?”

“No,” Steve shakes his head, “that’s the worst thing: she did. She _did_ say them. But she didn’t react to my words to her.”

“Maybe you should find out if one-sided soulmates are a thing,” Bucky muses.

“Now you’ve really sold me on the idea,” Steve says, deadpan. “That’s a great situation to be in. One-sided pining.”

“I’m just suggesting stuff, because you are not doing anything. And you are in love with her anyway, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” Steve says almost to himself. “Yeah, I am.”

~*~

“Are you sure that Steve is not your soulmate?” Jane asks out of the blue one day.

Darcy’s head jerks up and she stares at Jane.

“And I know your stance on the whole soulmate matter,” Jane holds her hands up in defense, “but… you know. If nothing else… it would make sense. Two peas in a pod and all that.”

“I know… but he isn’t,” Darcy states quietly, “my soulmate, I mean.”

Jane squints at her. “How can you be so sure?”

“Because he actually said my words to me, but when I answered he didn’t react. He didn’t flinch, he remained perfectly nice, cordial, unfailingly polite… nothing more. So I didn’t say his.”

Jane looks pensive for a moment. “I know that the soulmate science still has a long way to figure all of it out, but you know, maybe you guys are a special case. Maybe it’s just one-sided. Do you even know if he has a mark?”

“No, we never talk about these things.”

“Maybe it’s got to do with the serum…” Jane suggests.

“Or maybe it’s the universe punishing me for my scepticism,” Darcy mutters.

“So you agree that he’s perfect for you?”

“If there was one person I’d want to spend the rest of my life with, it’s Steve…” Darcy says quietly.

“Then you should do something,” Jane says with a decisive nod. “You were such a great advocate of agency. Maybe this is the universe telling you that you should take matters into your own hands.”

~*~

Darcy and Steve don’t do anything for a few more months. They dance around the topic, much to the frustration of their friends who try to force the issue, so in the end fate decides to give them a second chance.

Darcy is on a mission to pick up paperwork that Tony had to sign for Pepper from the labs, when she runs into Steve, head first. He catches her and his hand lingers on her lower back, right where her mark is.

Darcy grins up at him. He’s in full armour (because, as she knows, he’s in training the whole day), which is always a treat for sore eyes.

Darcy pokes him in the stomach, right where his mark is. “Whoops Captain,” Darcy says, grinning widely. “Sorry,” she adds, unapologetic.

There’s a noticeable gap in their conversation. Steve stares at Darcy, head tilted to one side. His thumb traces circles on her lower back and it feels warm and safe and he looks at her like he’s seeing her for the first time but at the same time has known her his whole life.

Darcy opens her mouth to say something when the silence between them stretches entirely too long.

“Can I help you?” he then says very clearly.

And suddenly it all falls together.

Darcy’s arms fall to her side and she stumbles a step backwards. She stares at him in shock.

“Did I say your words when I met you three years ago?” she asks, flabbergasted.

“Yeah,” Steve nods a slow grin spreading on his face, “you did. And I said yours, a week later, didn’t I?”

Darcy comes up to him and hugs him. “Yeah.” The sound is muffled because her face is pressed into his chest, with Steve’s arms wrapped around her tightly. He kisses the crown of her hair and she just breathes him in, her soulmate, before she looks up at him.

“We were such idiots,” they both say at the same time.

“God, I was hoping it would be you,” Darcy confesses. “For months, years probably.”

“Me too,” he agrees. “But I thought it was one-sided, hopeless.”

“We wasted three years,” Darcy shakes her head.

Steve tips her face toward him with a finger on her chin. “Doesn’t matter, because we found each other in the end and now I can finally do this,” he simply says, before leaning down to kiss her.


End file.
